Sunday, August 21, 2011

Art in Chelsea, Explained

Highline Park, Saturday afternoon, 8/13.

Among throngs enjoying the gorgeous weather by walking the Highline, one figure walked a head above the rest...  There were so many people, and it was so hot, why on earth does that guy have another head strapped on top of his head?  PEY?

Right.  It's art.  Moving art!  The artist himself, Matthias Alfen, thrilled to stop and pose for a picture, seemed neither hot nor bothered.  He handed me his card and encouraged future sightings.  I wonder if there are any art meets at which he can be his team's mascot?  After checking out his YouTube channel, I also wonder if his work even needs the support of a mini-tramp in order to dunk?

Sunday, February 13, 2011

One of these things...

...Is NOT like the others...

I spotted this gentleman on a Manhattan bound A train in Brooklyn Friday night.

Chinos...running hat...reading a shop tote bag...Leftover pizza, still in the box, on the floor of the subway?

Before I accepted this as the new wave of preppy edginess, I asked the guy, "Can you PEY?"

He denied owning the pizza box; didn't even notice the leftovers.  Now...was his book so engrossing?  Perhaps as he took his seat, he was still floating on the afterglow of the tannins from the Malbec he had just swished.  Or the rich bouquet offered by that Pinot...

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

(K)Night of the Gentleman

Christopher Street, West Village
Devote: D-E-V-O-T-E.  I'm not sure how he made it sound so much like Walter.
He told me that he wore the headdress because he's a member of, 'Knights of the Gentlemen," just like King Arthur.  That's what he said.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Aren't Shoes and Shirt Required? Everywhere?

I am SO sorry that this picture is so dark.  I'll do my best to set the scene... It's Game 5 of the ALCS and the Yankees are going to win at home.  I go to Dive 75 to meet a friend from Harlem who's agreed to come exactly halfway downtown to my up.  It's nice to drink a beer and watch a game on a Wednesday during true happy hour rather than feeling that tug that I really...better...get...home...
So the Yankees are making it happen and my beer was delicious.  It was nice to catch up with my uptown friend and then we see the guy on the couch take off his shirt.  And leave it off.  He was flabbing it out over there in the corner...  It wasn't hot in the bar, and he clearly hadn't spilled anything as there was no sense of panic nor any Tide pens being passed around.  Man, why aren't you wearing a shirt?  Please explain yourself!

The first time we asked there was no reason.  Uptown friend suspected drug use.  Probably because uptown friend thinks most curiosities (not to mention afternoons) should be addressed with drug use.  But explanations come to those who wait.

When his lady friend took her exit, and with his shirt back on, our new friend came to chat with us.  He's a nudist whose girlfriend won't join in--what a predicament!  They have a good thing going, but she doesn't want to expose her three children to the nudist lifestyle.  He knows other nudists' children and they're exceptionally well-adjusted.  In fact, he's offering her kids a gift with his resistance to wearing clothes.  She should recognize the positive influence he's bringing them.  If he had kids, wait, no, he does NOT want his own children under any circumstances.  It's nice to date her for that reason--she's finished having children--but he can't closet his nudist tendencies.  Instead they closet their relationship.  They hit up Dive 75 on Wednesday afternoons where, just for a while, he can hang with his girlfriend and without his shirt.  In peace.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Business in Front, Revival in the Back

What? Is it a church? Or a barber shop??!?

I did it. My curiosity built up more and more. After 16 months of passing this 2nd floor shop on Church Ave in Flatbush, I called its number. I spoke to CoPastor Joan West and asked for an explanation. She could not have been nicer! In between each sentence, she invited me to come up and check it out for myself. 'Upon This Rock' is a barber shop by day, a church by night. They do it all!
Upon risk of making a (truly) terrible connection, I couldn't help but consider that the Pastors West aren't the first to mullet up their religious expression. Check out this haircut:

After reflection, I think this is a mullet! At the very least, I think He could use the Wests' services. Upon This Rock is totally on to something.

Sunday, November 22, 2009


This kind gentleman walked with his wife, who was having an alcohol-induced tough time, to the NJ Transit train in Penn Station Friday night. When I asked if his message was for real ("Now that's a shirt, sir!"), he showed me the front, reading, DON'T F*&^ WITH ME; I'M ON VACATION.

He loooooved talking to me about his shirt. The trouble was, what he was saying didn't make any sense. I bet he really does what it says.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Three Wolves Get Formal

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This was a fun wedding. Really fun. The photographers raved about how the dance floor was packed all night like nothing they'd ever seen.

Now here's a pack of something you've never seen on a dance floor: The Three Wolves Tuxedo.

I've been seeking an explanation for weeks, yet given the fact that this gentleman simply looked AWESOME, I've concluded that no further explanation is necessary. That pack of wolves on his back rocked out all night, as you'll see in the video. Congratulations, Jill & Farhad!!